What Not to Do On a Half-Marathon
- Don't pop behind a bush in the middle of your half marathon for a nature call and sit on a wasp nest (especially if you are severely allergic)
- Don't run into the middle of the road screaming for your walking partner to save you with your knickers around your ankles.
- Don't wave down the next vehicle - who looks at you blankly while you scream.
- Don't just open the door and jump in screeching to be taken back to the beginning of the half marathon only to find as you exit the vehicle that the driver was completely deaf and probably thought you were two drunk ladies out after a hard night.
- Don't then hop into the nearest on-standby ambulance only to have a fire-engine dispatched (busy morning!!) to collect you (oooohh, hunky firemen asking where your stings are...!!!)
- Don't have your walking buddy suddenly remember that her mobile phone takes photos... oooohhh... aaaahhh....
- Don't then have a real ambulance turn up to transport you to hospital among much hilarity regarding where the stings might be.
- And definatly don't sit in the hospital for the next 8 hours, right in front of the ambulance bay where giggling ambulance staff have to parade past you for the whole day.
Nancy
Last Updated: 3/27/06
